Am I actually allowed to miss her the way I do right now?
"The words are like suicide. They happen fast and weep in vain." -Matthew Good (A Better Pain)
I should be sleeping and not thinking about self-inflicted gsw's past and present.
I just need to take it easy. I should sit on this rock for a little while until I feel I can get up and run again. It would make me feel better. Instead, I'm going to half-ass my way through the next two weeks, relax over the break and start the cycle again in a month or so.
Any other answer I could ever come up with would be a cop-out and not worth a second thought. Everything that has ever happened to me is my fault and I'll deal with it as whining and begrudgingly as I have the rest of my life.
'maybe or maybe not, it's all the same.'