I finished off the seventy millilitres of liquid codeine that I had left over from my tonsilectomy. The bottle said "5 mg per ml". I think that's a lot of codeine. To wash down the horrible taste I had two beers and a dozen Advil. I watched the Discovery Channel and The Learning Channel for most of the last two hours, as well as Jay Leno for a bit.
I'm not sure what I did, but I have blood all over my shorts. The sight of it made me nauseous and I threw up a whole lot. I just ate six chocolate marshmallow puff thingies and I'm feeling considerably better, physically and mentally. I wanted another beer and more codeine, but I felt bad about drinking all the beer and I couldn't find the codeine (same stuff) my sister got for her wisdom teeth.
My sister is watching The Royal Tenenbaums. I hate my mother.
I think I'll just go eat more thingies.